(Please note: These aren’t universal ace traits, so don’t worry if you don’t fit into them all. This shouldn’t be looked at like a checklist or “Am I Asexual? You can still be asexual even if you’ve experienced none of the things on this list and you may not be asexual even if you’ve experienced most of them.There’s no diagnostic test to confirm if you’re asexual, there’s no twenty-seven point checklist, and you don’t have to pass an initiation or be referred by someone who’s already in the club.It’s like saying “You’re unxonoxian if you’ve never seen a xonox.” How are you supposed to know if you’ve never seen a xonox, when you have absolutely no idea what a xonox is?Maybe you’ve seen one, but just didn’t know that’s what it was called.You think of sex in anthropological or scientific terms, rather than romantic or erotic terms.You might be interested in sex, but interested in the same way one is interested in geology or zoology.As the conversation went on, it became apparent that I was focused on the wrong thing, that it wasn’t meant to be about the impossible and/or uncomfortable contortions required to make the scene believable, it was meant to be about the sex. I’ll often find things odd about scenes in movies or TV shows and try to sort out the problems afterward.
You’d rather read the Kinsey Report than Penthouse.You realize that everyone else thinks about sex in a completely different manner than you do.This is the one that finally tipped me over the edge.It became absolutely clear to me that my views on sex were completely different from anyone else I’d ever talked to. There was something fundamentally different about me.It was because of that realization that I went out to try to discover exactly what it was that was going on with me, which is how I discovered asexuality.